When the Levee Breaks
"When the Levee Breaks: A guide to dealing with and avoiding arrest and prosecution in BDSM scenes."
"When the Levee Breaks" is a companion to the NCSF publication, "The Aftermath," and is a guide to provide a perspective for those who have, through mistake, misunderstanding, or a fleeting lapse of reason, committed an act of criminally actionable sexual assault. It is not intended to provide a defense for indefensible acts. "When the Levee Breaks" also provides information on how to better protect oneself against arrest and prosecution.
Click to get a PDF of "When the Levee Breaks"
NCSF Key Programs - Incident Response, Consent Counts, Kink Aware Professionals Directory, Media Outreach, Education Outreach, DSM-5 Revision
For more information on any of these programs, please Contact Us, email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or call (410) 539-4824
Incident Response Program
When you need help and don't know where to turn, NCSF may be able to help. Our Incident Response program helps hundreds of people every year. We make a difference for individuals and organizations facing discrimination, legal crisis and other important life events related to their kink interests.
Swing Party
Kinky Kollege and SINSations in Leather
Every year, Leather SINS produces two national BDSM events in Chicago: Kinky Kollege and SINSations in Leather. Ever since the Concerned Women for America attacked five Midwest BDSM conferences in 2002, Leather SINS has consulted with the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom to ensure that our events would not face the same problems if we were attacked by religious political extremists.
Leather SINS has consulted with NCSF about a variety of issues while producing our events. We asked Susan Wright to accept the position as our media spokesperson, posting her phone number on our website so she can respond instantly to any media inquiries. Susan checks every page of our website for each event, looking for statements and phrases that may need clarification or may possibly cause problems if taken out of context by the media.
Leather SINS has gratefully named NCSF as one of our "WE CARE!" charities (along with LA&M). We're proud to be a Coalition Partner of NCSF, and would urge any group to take advantage of NCSF's knowledgeable Incident Response program consultants when producing an event.
In leather heart and soul,
Master Z
Leather SINS President & Event Director
Folsom Street Fair
We contacted the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom to access the Incident Response program. Within hours, we spoke with a highly trained and knowledgeable media and PR consultant for support. In addition to her moral support, we received a meticulous training for our Board of Directors and staff, preparing us to better manage these attacks. Also, the program consultant was able to field all media inquiries - and serve as a positive voice for our community - during our events, so that we could focus on our production duties. We can't thank NCSF enough for their good work and for being there when we needed them.
Demetri
Moshoyannis
Executive
Director
Folsom
Street Events
Catalina Loves
My relationship with the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) began like many others do. I was neck deep in a conflict that was based in my free expression of my sexuality through my writing. I was asked to leave my teaching position, an agreement was reached and I left quietly without creating a scene. I used to teach in a small, private school in North Carolina, where my daughter also attended school. When I left my teaching position I was assured that it would not affect her last and final year of middle school.
Months passed, and we were within days of her returning to the 8th grade when I received a call from the Head of School that he had decided to rescind his offer to allow her to go to school there. After heated debate, he agreed that she could attend school, but if and only if I could secure a $1,000.00 expense fee to cover her field trips and lunches in advance. It was a bullshit fee, to be honest. It’s not required of any other parent. He knew that we would not be able to come up with $1,000 in a matter of days. This was his way of keeping her out without risking litigation.
So I wondered what led this man, elder in his church, who had given me his word that my child would be unaffected, to suddenly revoke something that we had agreed upon? He said that based on an email to my husband, he had changed his mind. I looked at Marky, while still on the phone, and asked, “Did you exchange any emails in the last month with the school?” Of course he had not. Well the school made a terrible error. They contacted my ex-husband, not my husband. They contacted someone who has no legal custody of our daughter, and based on that conversation had decided that I would no longer be welcome in the parent community.
This happened, I’m sure by no coincidence, at the same time that I received threatening emails from my ex-husband, who suggested that due to my deviant behavior she should come to live with him.
I reacted immediately. First, I raised the money in a raffle that was initially supported by Lochai and quickly built into a huge CommUNITY movement of kinksters who were outraged. Secondly, I contact NCSF and accessed professional advice and consultations through their Kink Aware Professionals (KAP) listing. With the help of the community and the NCSF I felt prepared for battle.
Now, coming full circle, I am honored that my PR firm, Quid Pro Quo, will be working with NCSF on the launching of a new blog. We are doing the work pro-bono to show NCSF our appreciation and to give back to an organization that protects all of us. It feels really great to be in a position to give back. So do us a favor and help us help them. We’ll be asking people to re-post and tweet links and I hope you’ll consider it your way of giving back to such an amazing organization.
Catalina
Loves
Best Sex
Bloggers
Fetlife
Incident Reporting & Response Mission Statement
The NCSF Incident Reporting & Response Team's purpose is to provide assistance to individuals and groups within the alternative sexual expression communities who become victimized by actions of local authorities in opposition to the freedom of expression of SM, leather/fetish, or swing practices.
NCSF is not legal aid, nor do we offer specific legal advice for individuals. NCSF is a resource for the members of the kink, poly and Lifestyle communities and for people seeking information about them. NCSF provides publicly available information on kink and nonmonogamy for consenting adults. We advocate on behalf of the BDSM, swing and polyamory communities.
The issue must openly, directly, and specifically relate to BDSM, swing or poly activities between consenting adults; in other words, the problems you face must relate to or be caused from your involvement in BDSM, swing or poly without question.
What Is Incident Reporting & Response
NCSF is a resource for the members of the kink, poly and Lifestyle communities and for people seeking information about them. If you engage in BDSM, fetishes or non-monogamy practices, and you are being persecuted or discriminated against because of it, please contact NCSF through the Get Help Now. If you need help removing kink or non-monogamy as a barrier to public services, please contact NCSF. If your group or business needs help with outreach to local officials, please contact NCSF.If you or your group needs help with a consent violation or sexual assault, please contact NCSF. GET HELP NOW!
The issue must openly, directly, and specifically relate to BDSM, swing or poly activities between consenting adults; in other words, the problems you face must relate to or be caused from your involvement in BDSM, swing or poly.
NCSF is not legal aid, nor do we offer specific legal advice for individuals. NCSF is a resource for the members of the kink, poly and Lifestyle communities and for people seeking information about them. NCSF provides publicly available information on kink and nonmonogamy for consenting adults.
Incident Reporting & Response – 2018 Report
By Susan Wright
279 reports and requests for help were received by NCSF in 2018. This is a significant increase compared to previous years:
170 requests in 2017
109 requests in 2016
198 requests in 2015
184 requests in 2014
NCSF maintains the confidentiality of those who come to us for help, however we balance that with the need to report the services we are providing and to provide the community with a record of where the need is the greatest. Here is a breakdown of the cases the IRR Team dealt with in 2018:
Criminal
107 people made reports & requested assistance, up by nearly 50% compared to 76 reports in 2017:
- 74 requests from people who reported an assault, sexual assault, stalking, harassment or vandalization involving BDSM or non-monogamy, requesting assistance in educating law enforcement, investigators, prosecutors and victim advocates or referrals for expert witnesses. In 2017, there were 57 reports.
- 29 people requested resources and referrals to assist in defending themselves against accusations of assault, sexual assault, domestic violence, stalking, harassment, Restraining Order, parole violations or the appeals process. In 2017, there were 16 reports.
- 2 people needed help with sex worker related issues
- 2 sex-positive business-owners needed help after employees embezzled and threatened them
Groups
95 groups, events and businesses requested assistance or a member requested assistance with their group. That’s more than double the 42 reports in 2017. There were 24 reports in 2016, and 50 reports in both 2015 and 2014. Here are the reports for 2018:
- 26 Groups/Events received information on dealing with consent violations
- 25 Groups/Events were reporting a ban or inquiring about reports on a presenter/member
- 11 groups needed assistance with incorporation, by-laws or legal matters involving members including lawsuits and subpoenas
- 7 groups needed assistance in creating a consent policy for their group
- 6 people were protesting being banned by a group
- 5 people needed assistance resolving a consent incident with their group
- 4 groups had their event challenged through contract cancellation or threats of cancellation
- 3 groups asked for assistance in dealing with police outreach
- 2 groups needed resources and referrals for attorneys for their members
- 2 groups asked for assistance in doing outreach to local civic and community organizations
- 1 business was reported two separate times by a number of its members: regarding bulling and sexual harassment, and privacy issues
- 1 group was reported for outing its members
- 1 group reported discrimination when their bank suspended their account
Child Custody and Divorce
30 people requested help with child custody cases, and there was 1 divorce case. This is similar compared to 27 reports in 2017. There were 16 reports in 2016, 26 in 2015, and 37 in 2014.
- 18 involved parents who are kinky (6 with FetLife photos and 1 with photos on the cloud)
- 5 involved parents in non-moogamous relationships
- 2 involved both BDSM and non-monogamous relationships
- 3 involved sex work
- 1 involved same-sex marriage
- 1 involved CPS and a parent that identified as vanilla
- 1 divorce case involving a Master/slave contract
Civil
24 requests for assistance in civil issues compared to 13 in 2017:
- 5 people reported being outed (3 involved FetLife pics)
- 4 people needed employment attorneys to deal with discrimination due to BDSM (3) and non-monogamy (1)
- 2 involved Title IX issues for educators who discussed sex positive issues including BDSM
- 2 people needed attorneys to deal with civil legal matters.
- 2 people needed help with civic and community organizations
- 2 people were banned or had their account suspended by businesses
- 2 people needed legal options involving their polyamorous relationships
- 1 person needed help with photos that were posted without permission
- 1 educator was attacked when an event was attacked by religious political extremists
- 1 educator needed to find out the legality of a certain kind of BDSM play
- 1 person complained about social media discrimination
- 1 witness needed assistance regarding their participation in a criminal trial
Professionals
There were 22 requests about kink and nonmonogamy:
- 13 professionals requested education on BDSM, consent, ageplay, FOSTA/SESTA, and translation of NCSF resources into Hebrew, Greek and French to better serve their clients and present workshops for their professional groups. These requests came from researchers, professors, graduate students, therapists and victim advocacy agencies.
- 9 people requested referrals to kink and polyamory aware professionals
If you need NCSF’s help because of discrimination or to remove kink as a barrier to service, please contact our Incident Reporting & Response today! Email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
Please join now or donate to support NCSF’s direct services!
NCSF is not legal aid, nor do we offer specific legal advice for individuals. NCSF is a resource for the members of the kink, poly and Lifestyle communities and for people seeking information about them. NCSF provides publicly available information on kink and nonmonogamy for consenting adults. We advocate on behalf of the BDSM, swing and polyamory communities.
Unfortunately, due to limited resources the NCSF is only able to take the cases that meet the criteria set by our mission. All of our work is done by volunteers and we accept no payment for our services.
We are however happy to receive donations earmarked specifically for use in the IRR Program. Click here to donate, Make sure you note "Incident Reporting & Response" or "IRR" in the comment box if you want to restrict your donation. We do provide basic information as resources dictate and referrals to professionals as part of our Kink Aware Professionals database.
The criteria for acceptance listed were developed to meet the primary concerns of our voting constituencies, our Coalition Partners. When the NCSF agrees to take a case the impact can be realized by all of our constituents as a whole and therefore it is up to the policies set in motion by NCSF Coalition Partners to decide whether existing resources allow for a case to be handled effectively.
NCSF Can Help...
NCSF Publishes Important Information for Your Mental Health; NCSF and the Foundation are proud to announce two new and valuable publications: A Guide to Choosing a Kink-Aware Therapist, and the Therapists Guide to Polyamory.
The BDSM Survey is up. Take a look!
If you are seeking a Kink Aware Professional (KAP).
Our KAP program allows professionals who are friendly to BDSM, swing, and poly individuals to list themselves as "kink friendly." It serves as a resource for people to self-refer for help from theraputic, legal and other professionals who will not prejudge based on the consensual adult activities of our constituents. We've recently added documents for "How to Choose a Kink Aware Therapist" in long and short form as well as a booklet geared for those in the theraputic community that focuses on poly issues.
If you are seeking assistance or our Incident Response Program
Criteria for acceptance include consideration of whether a significant issue relevant to NCSF's primary constituencies is at stake, what impact can be realized for our constituents as a whole if NCSF gets involved, and whether existing resources allow for a case to be handled effectively.