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Guest Blog: Southwest Love Fest - Arizona's First Conference on Ethical Non-Monogamy

on Thursday, 08 March 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, NCSF News

By Matt Connolly


April 6-8, 2018, marks the first time Tucson, Arizona will be the site of Arizona's first conference on ethical non-monogamy, Southwest Love Fest (swlovefest.com). Created with the intention of establishing an annual forum to discuss the many aspects of non-monogamous relationships, this event will introduce an active and growing national community to some of our best known leaders and mentors in the practice of Polyamory. Kevin Patterson, Dr. Elizabeth Sheff, the Multiamory Crew, Cunning Mix and Lusty Guy as well as NCSF's own Susan Wright, will be some of the presenters sharing their experience with attendees.

As one of the leader's of Phoenix's Polyamory community and a member of NCSF, I was very excited to hear about the planning of this event. I attended the first organizational meeting and signed up to fill the role of Volunteer Coordinator. I like to think of myself as a Poly Advocate so I was happy to get involved in helping to create this conference. Advocacy for me means both living the practice of ethical non-monogamy as well as offering support in whatever position I'm able.

Please visit our website for more information and to purchase tickets. We look forward to seeing you there!

What I Learned When I Got Polyamory 'Wrong'

on Tuesday, 06 March 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Refinery29

"I still define myself as poly, but polyamory is about keeping an open mind. It’s an attitude, not a job description. Though I may be in one single relationship currently, that may not always be the case, because the integral part of polyamory – the vital thing I learned when my first relationship failed – is that patience is key."

Can you be in love with two people at once? ‘The Bachelor’ keeps raising the question.

on Tuesday, 06 March 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Washington Post

Nor is it always monogamous. “One clever solution to the unique dilemma the bachelor is in would be to offer both finalists a relationship — more specifically, to be polyamorous,” says Rhonda Balzarini, a PhD candidate studying polyamorous relationships at Western University in Ontario.

Meet the Minnesotans finding love through polyamory

on Tuesday, 06 March 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

City Pages

“It’s not a fear of commitment. It’s commitment, plus one,” she says. “Jim and I spent 20 years together monogamously and this is not a plug to fill a problem. This is something that the parts are greater than the whole and it would be sad to not take advantage of this opportunity for everybody’s life to be fuller, richer, better.”

Avatar Celebrates 35 Years of Art, Leather, and BDSM

on Friday, 02 March 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Advocate

The men of Avatar Club Los Angeles celebrated 35 years of BDSM education at one of the premier leather events of 2018 on February 17th.

Meet the Minnesotans finding love through polyamory

on Friday, 02 March 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

City Paper

“It’s not a fear of commitment. It’s commitment, plus one,” she says. “Jim and I spent 20 years together monogamously and this is not a plug to fill a problem. This is something that the parts are greater than the whole and it would be sad to not take advantage of this opportunity for everybody’s life to be fuller, richer, better.”

Guest Blog: The Open Photo Project - An Artist Statement from Photographer Erika Kapin

on Monday, 26 February 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, NCSF News

Gloria was in the closet about being polyamorous for years. What it took for her to come out was being diagnosed with breast cancer. Upon diagnosis, she realized how short life is and that she wanted to be out and proud in all her identities. However, she still keeps her polyamorous identity hidden from her sister in order to avoid condemnation from her family or origin. Rose, Josh and Xtina are in a committed relationship, share a home and raise their young child together. They have worries about legal rights for all three parents and protections for their child. They hope the state will eventually acknowledge their three-parent household. Ignacio Rivera raised a daughter to adulthood as a non-monogamous single parent. When Ignacio’s daughter was very young, they were living on welfare and Ignacio faced intense stigma, judgment and slut shaming for being a single mother who is also polyamorous. Aida has several romantic partners and works as a therapist helping others with similar identities. Most of Aida’s family are very religious would not approve of non-monogamy, so Aida often introduces partners as ‘good friends’ for fear of family non-acceptance and retaliation. Chrissy avoids socializing with her children’s friend’s parents because in her conservative neighborhood, she fears if other parents discover she and her husband are polyamorous, they will be stigmatized.

TheOpenPhotoProject MichaelAndSarah 2016 08 03 MG 1250 2

Consensual non-monogamy is typically defined as the state of being sexually or romantically involved with more than one person simultaneously, with the full awareness and consent of those involved. Many relationship identities exist under the consensual non-monogamy umbrella including polyamory, relationship anarchy, swinging, open relationships, poly-fidelity and more.

02 MG 8411

Adults who love outside of the monogamous ideal often face negative repercussions. Non-monogamous people can face discrimination from mainstream society, employers, and landlords. Many become ostracized from their family of origin and experience lack of legal protection around issues of child custody. Polyamorous people have been fired from their jobs because, while there are legal protections against workplace discrimination based on sexual orientation, being polyamorous is not legally defined as a sexual orientation and therefore does not receive the same legal protection. Because of the threat of social, familial and legal ramifications, many people in these relationships are forced to remain closeted and present socially as monogamous.

TheOpenPHotoProject 2015 MG 9127

By combining photographs of non-monogamous people in their daily lives with their own words about relationships, The Open Photo Project challenges the mainstream social ideals that enforce a compulsory understanding of monogamy as the only ethical relationship style. The stories in this project strive to de-stigmatize consensually non-monogamous relationships by bringing awareness and cultivating empathy.

TheOpenPhotoProject ChrisAndZ 2015 03 28 MG 2093

By photographing non-monogamous people in a variety of their everyday activities, I seek to present them as the complex, multi-dimensional human beings that they are. Whether cooking a meal, on the way to work, or naked with a partner, these images reveal the complex lives of these people and their choices. A combination of portraits, daily life activities and text excerpts from conversations will show an in-depth look into their lives and relationship choices.

TheOpenPhotoProject KevinAntoinetteRebeccaCira 2017 09 MG 0969

My goal is to confront the broad misconceptions that exist in the mainstream social landscape where monogamy is the default relationship style (and the only one universally considered ethical). In addressing people who believe that monogamy is the only acceptable relationship model to cultivate healthy romantic love, I wish to introduce them to the beautiful, complex and fulfilling lives that are possible among non-monogamous people.

TheOpenPhotoProject LolaAndThreePiece 2017 09 MG 1075web

This project offers a look at the uniqueness of human relationships and an invitation to re-examine preconceived notions of successful, sustainable, and healthy romantic love.

TheOpenPhotoProject RoseMegan 2017 04 30 MG 0222

How to Create an Open Environment for Talking About Sex

on Saturday, 24 February 2018. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Vogue

“I mean, the very first question someone asked one day was, ‘How do I introduce BDSM into my sex life?’ ” he says, “and I raised my hand like, ‘Hey, I have a question for all of you: What is BDSM?’ And so they tell me what it is—essentially Fifty Shades of Grey, right?—and we start talking about it, and people are sort of passively saying, ‘Well, you know, it’s when you engage in sort of fantasy play and you use whips and chains,’ and all these things, and I was sitting there just like, ‘Wow, I have the most boring sex life.’ I had no idea that we could use sex as a prism to look at things like safety and trust and self-respect and creativity and our childhood and our relationship to our friends and our parents and the world around us. I was just like, ‘That’s unbelievable.’ ”

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